Baby Steps

It comes to us all eventually. Most of us. Some. Ok, look, do it if you want to, alright?

Babies. I had to be convinced that they were a good idea. It took a long time, but now the baby is fab. Wish that I'd had one sooner. If only for the reason I'm going to be in a wheelchair when they're running around wanting to do stuff and all the kid's friends will be like, 'Why does your grandpa always pick you up from school?'

Like. Another pet hate, but a verbal habit I can't shake.

I often wonder what I did with all my time before the babe came along and suspect this is a pretty common feeling. Gaming is naturally bottom of the list of priorities. It's a hobby. I think I had come to believe that it was almost a right. A necessity, like electricity. Try telling my wife that - after she's finished laughing, her face will go all serious in the blink of an eye. 'No.'

Be told.

It took me a while to get used to it (not having infinite time for games, not the little one). I don't begrudge it (the time lost, not the little one), in fact. It has actually forced me to rationalise my gaming habit. Only to play what's important to me. To focus on one game rather than chopping and changing, never fully experiencing the game to it's full, wasting money on buying games that I play for an hour - and so on. Has stopped me from spending willfully on Steam sales 'just because it's cheap'. That's a real positive. It goes without saying of course that the main upside is that I have a small, fully functioning autonomous human being to look after and love, a superb replacement.

Pre-baby, I could feel the 'game library dilemma' getting close to a situation that I experienced with my PS1. Before my PS1 was chipped, I invested money (at the time the cost of a game a real consideration), time and enjoyment in a game. Post-chippage, I had a stack of 10 games for cheap (around £3 each) all at once, would play each one for half an hour and then move on, not really enjoying any of them, It was more related to volume of games and time, I think. It's at that point that I stopped bothering to play copied titles and considered which ones I could afford to buy and had much more fun out of them in the long run.

Whilst a baby has really stopped me, I noticed that Steam sales were leading to exactly the same situation. Why buy another game just because it's so cheap when I still have a few others on the go? One only needs to look at common comments about Steam libraries and 'back-catalogues', or use Steam APIs to stalk your friends to see that 2/3 of titles are often unplayed. Not cracked games - just the sheer volume and time required has relegated them to never even being downloaded. Not that Valve cares, of course. Their money trucks just keep rolling in and also includes a nice little piece about why Half-Life 3 will never be made, and once I heard it, I tend to agree with them. Incidentally, a new article about HL3 with an interview from a Valve staffer (allegedly) can be found here. There will be no HL3.

I recently bought Last of Us. Had been wanting to for a loooong time, ever since first hearing about it, but never got around to it. Last of Us 2 was announced just before Christmas, so thought I really ought to make the effort, so I dusted off my PS3, plugged a network cable in and had a look. It was 20 quid for what seemed like everything, DLC and what not. Turns out that I had not logged into PSN for 2 years or so. Slack, eh?

Downloaded LoU and began an install. Apparently, I didn't have enough disk space, so I deleted the 'big' game on my disk, Wipeout HD/Fury - still no space. Ok, deleted all games. Still not enough space. Right. Seeing as I'd not been online for a while, I deleted all save games, game info, the lot. Turns out I was still 700Mb short, as the firmware takes up *just enough* space to stop me installing my new game. Arse.

A short bit of investigation later reminded me that I was still running the HD that the PS3 came with on launch day in 2008 - a (useable) 37Gb. Great. Being somewhat of a geek, I at least didn't have to order a disk, so had a rummage and found a 2" 350Gb drive lying around that merely needed a format. Then the USB drive I put the firmware onto didn't work, so had to find another... aaaaaannd it finally booted. I had a fully updated PS3 and could check out my new game.

Well. Last of Us - what a treat! Not a massive fan of these type of games, as I tend to get bored by them, but in this case, the story was good enough to keep me interested. Better than good actually, it was excellent. Thoroughly enjoyed the play through (although sometimes the clunky movement got up my nose), and, am not ashamed to say it, teared up once or twice. Not many games can claim that. I wondered whether it was because I now had a child of my own that some scenes affected me and suspect so.

Of course, this revitalised PS3 playing has made me look at PS4s. Le sigh. They are ridiculously cheap now for what they are, but still - as I get older I'm starting to feel that 'this one hasn't packed up yet, so I don't need a new one'. But y'know. Western shopping instincts.

I really enjoyed the time on Last of Us, and it was a game that felt like it rewarded the focus, actually gave you a story back with all it's hopes (or lack thereof) and dreams of Ellie & Joel. Pausing to think that this world was all that she knew, not the world that we're all familiar with. What would my child be like in this situation? Would they become infected? How would I deal with it? Could I actually, look them in the eyes and shoot them in the head? Clearly nonsense, but an illustration of the power of the game's environment and story that you find yourself idly thinking about these things whilst making your way around a quieter section of a level. It allows you brain space, isn't a constant shoot and stress factory. In fact, one of my favourite parts of the game comes near the end - and I probably won't be giving anything away here since it's two years old - but as you get to Salt Lake City and see the small Giraffe family, calmly walking around having a graze. Beautiful. You can see the effort that the devs went to with this game - not to belittle the efforts that all developers give in crunch-time - and it really does show. The game timer showed around 20 hours, maybe a little less, spread over 6 weeks or so, and that was the only game that I played. Loved it.

Little ones sure do reduce your game time, but if I'm brutally honest, I think it's actually made me appreciate games more. That and having an hilarious little person running around doing funny shit.

Dote you want me baby

Sim racing. It filled my gaming time for a good few months with thrills and spills, ditches, rocks and the odd tree. Dirt Rally however, has got a bit old for me. Codemasters did a sterling job with the game, and bringing out new cars as free DLC as promised (that all handled differently), but sadly no new tracks. Understandable really, the lengths that they went to to make the stages just so was nothing short of heroic. That shit costs money, and lots of it. That's one reason.

The other is that there's no time now. There's only DotA.

According to DotaBuff, I first had a game in February/March 2014, and only 3 games at that. I probably got yelled at for feeding, not levelling my abilities properly, not buying wards, hell, not buying items. Who the hell needs items anyway. Not this cancerous feeder. I can only assume it was uninstalled in disgust at the toxicity of the community, none of which was my fault oh-dear-me-no. The next time I had a go was when The International 4 rolled around - I enjoyed watching the pros play, and they (Valve) set up a noob stream to basically explain what the eff was going on. Playing wise, I lasted a single game.

The International is Valve's yearly 'main event' for DotA; the best teams from around the world gather together to compete in a tournament with a prize pool that grows bigger every year - nearly $11 million in 2014 (over $20 million 2016). It's is partly funded by players buying skins and a 'compendium' (then), 'battlepass' (now) containing loot, quests and what-not from Valve, and 25% of the purchase price of these goes towards the prize pool.

July 2015 - TI5 was getting nearer, shit I'd better have another crack at this game. Figure it out once and for all. This time I did it properly, advertised on Dotafire as a noob, LFG. Some experienced players picked me up and taught me the basics, and put up with my shit. It was so much more fun. They were all far, far above me in MMR (MatchMaking Ranking, DotA ELO effectively), so whilst I enjoyed the experience mostly, and we were in a 5 stack so I didn't get continually griefed, the games were hard. I was with 2 year old players, against 2 year old players, and still feeling my way like Captain Michaelus Raphael prowling the Sin of Damnation. You want over-wrought similes? This is the spot.

I played for longer, watched the streams for longer, understood barely half of it. Soldiered on for a few months, made it until the end of November when I played 10 games in one session and lost 7. I think my new found friends finally got sick of me, because I started to get mildly frustrated comments like, 'Why were you there? What were you doing? You should be here. P-p-p-ping!' Small potatoes in DotA insult-world that, but I quietly let the game finish, and then quit. Deleted them off my friends list, sold all my skins and uninstalled it. Fuck that game. Fuck them. I don't need that shit.

August 2016. TI6. Shit me, this game looks great. Why don't I still play it? This time. This time, I will bend this game to my will. Played a few matches, then absorbed myself in TI. The production quality was incredible - all credit to Valve, the production team and the commentators, they really pulled out all the stops. For example, if you'd bought a Vive headset, you could spectate in VR; I nearly bought one for just that! I steeled my will, and rode out the consumer desire. TI6 has been the best yet - here's the ending of a tightly fought game between Digital Chaos and Evil Geniuses.

This time I had a clue what was going on, I could follow the main stream, and didn't really need the noob one. I still missed some of the more esoteric details, but it was mostly there. I've noticed since then that my play has improved - I can last hit (sorta). I can support. I can ward. I can't pull yet, still keep forgetting, but meh. Muscle memory isn't there in a team-fight panic, but that's why I'm low MMR (720-odd). And you will panic.

This game has really got it's claws into me now. I try and at least play once an evening, twice if I'm lucky, time permitting. I'm definitely improving, my opponents are clearly better - and I need to get better to best them. The eternal challenge. The itemisation is still a struggle, still working from online builds mostly, but beginning to understand why I might choose the Heart of Tarrasque over Shiva's Guard in late game, for example. Solo queue does suck though; I try to remain positive, if there's any salt from team-mates to team-mates, I try and mediate, head it off - after all, criticism will only make that player play tilt more, and then you're really boned. Seems to work to some extent. My win rate is creeping up - 46.58% (out of 307 games), up from the doldrums of 44.67%. That's right, I've never claimed to be any good.

I'm digging this game, it feels as though I've crested a hump. I'd go as far to say that the DotA2 learning curve is akin to Eve Online's:



I love that pic.

I've still got a lot to learn. I still feed when I try a new toon. BUT! I can see when people are doing strange things... abstractly, my game-sense has improved. My MMR, KDA, GPM and XPM are all creeping up. I'm getting used to the blink dagger. I will never be pro, clearly. Those guys are all late teens to mid 20s, with reactions like cats.

I'd be happy with an MMR of 1500. For an introduction to the game, you could do worse than checking out Purge's 'Welcome to DotA. You suck'.

He's right. You will.

Running in circles

Seeing as I now have a wheel, I need to find games that I can use it with. Briefly toyed with the idea of attempting to use it playing Rainbow 6: Siege. Left and right to strafe, accelerate and brake forward and backwards. Gear up - iron sights, gear down, fire. Myriad of buttons to choose from to chuck grenade, use special. I think it would be hilarious for the first 5 minutes, then deeply frustrating. It's not an easy game at the best of times and quite unforgiving. Not to mention immensely irritating for your teammates. Now a whole *team* using steering wheels could be brilliant. Both teams even! The challenge would be to *do something meaningful* before the clock ran out.

[I have since tried it, and it was a disaster, and my team got rather salty. Quelle surprise. Hello internet.]

I digress. Racing sims seem to do some things well but not others - there's no one game that does it all. As soon as someone cracks that one, Steam will need to upgrade it's 100GB network again.

In the meantime, here are the choices that I've managed to drag together:
Project Cars (PC) - not bad, some hold it in little regard due to feelings of it being unfinished with lots of bugs whilst [paid] dlc is released, expensive for what it is (currently £50 on steam). Friends tell me it's great fun, v2 is on the way (12 months away perhaps).
Assetto Corsa (AC) - gorgeous, hot lapping game. Physics great, AI not bad, not so good online I'm told, low content.
Raceroom Racing Experience (R3E) - free (initially), incredible sound - tried one car, and could instantly match the straight cut gearbox with my Westfield's noise. Engine noise fab too. Ludicrous pricing model, as all but the most basic cars will cost you. (Car cost ranges from 2 - 5 Euros, some tracks extra, total cost around 100 Euros).
Iracing - excellent online racing due to regular policing and effective punishment above rookie level (enforced by your real name), subs, could be expensive, continual updates. Difficult. Also, you have to join the race's time, rather than just logging on any old time - a natural solution to a global racer, but difficult if you only have a certain amount of time to race at different times.
Rfactor2 - professional physics package, gfx not so hot, fairly reasonable price, long support tail.
Stock car extreme - quite highly regarded, if little known; the name belies the game content, as it's far more than just the title suggests. Brazilian based, so different tracks. Running an older game engine (understand it's Rfactor1 but modded and updated), cheap, lots of cars... and theres a new game coming out called Autmobilista, Q1 2016. One to keep an eye out for.
Copa petrobas - free, but reportedly suffers from complexity on setup.

I've been umm-ing and ah-ing over choosing one of these, but can't make my mind up. I've (so far) played 3 of them, Iracing, AC and R3E. Why just one? Well my playtime is fairly limited these days, so dilution is not really wanted. Plus, I don't want to spend all that cash (and it would add up quickly) to end up in a similar situation as when I bought 5 PS1 games for a tenner years ago: I only played each one for an hour or so before going onto the next, never really getting into any.

After chatting to some steam friends, who I knew to be very much into sim racing, I was given straightforward advice from a Fin - PC is shit, AC is ok, R3E is ok, Iracing is where it's at. As I'd been prevaricating for about a week now, I figured I should just do *something*. Make a decision. Any decision.

Iracing has an unusual install. After being spoon-fed with games for so long, there are a few more steps to take with this. Quite familiar with ./configure and makefiles on Linux, but faced with a Windows desktop, I just want to click that little .exe and not think. This is your first warning that Iracing is not your 'normal game'.

Iracing is also bewilderingly complex at first, not helped by the fact that it launches from the browser. A browser interface that is really cluttered and, well, awful. Before the first run through on the practice lap: calibrate wheel and field of view [FOV], check default FFB [Force FeedBack] settings. The second inkling that Iracing was bonkers was that it required me to input the size of my monitor (why not grab from Windows?) and how far I sit from it. This will then give you the FOV for the game, or, how much you can see of the car through the window. FFB settings need referring to the Iracing forums and reading lots. In fact, all of it requires reading quite a lot. This is not a Forza where you choose a car, track, and jump right in to lap your opponents' laughable times. This is srs bsns. If you're not fully sold on how detailed this game is, a further example: a friend who is *really* into flight sims (as in has a VR insight control box, X55 Hotas stick for MSFX) said that Iracing is 'pretty involved'.

So! Now I'm on track, in the advised MX5. Other advice included, 'Don't go online until you can go round a track without spinning off'. How hard could that be? It turns out, very. There is a racing line to use, but it's better to turn it off, no matter how beguiling, as you learn the tracks faster. There are other things to think about, such as rubber build-up on the racing line. I kid you not.

The sim has a few cars and tracks available, but they are not cheap - around 12USD per car/track. So, a high up-front cost (in addition to the subscription), but once you have all the tracks, you're well on the way. Bulk buy discounts are available.

R3E is a free install, but with paid microtransactions. A *lot* of paid microtransactions. Again, you have volume discounts, and others if you already own a form of the car in another class. As mentioned above, the sounds are excellent. Adds a lot to the experience and immersion. The driving model seems quite good, although I had it set on 'Amateur' rather than 'Real', and the AI set low. Graphics are pretty good too. Although it was free, I didn't want to get too into buying cars and tracks just yet.

Assetto Corsa, this was probably my strongest choice. The graphics are gorgeous, the interface, less so. When playing at 1440p, the menus are all crushed up into the centre of the screen. That quibble aside, the game plays well. It *is* more of a hot-lapping sim though, and is the one I eventually went for.

The tracks are good, I couldn't attest to their accuracy, although I can only assume that it's pretty close, otherwise you'd hear the outcry in Italy. The handling model seems fine (to my untrained hands), although there seems to be slightly too much FFB. The game does seem a little too willing to vibrate that thang sometimes. Once you get going, the game is very smooth, feels very competent, and the hot-lapping keeps you on it to better that time. I believe the developers are working on making the 'career mode' a little more fleshed out. Some hours in, it feels like there's something missing... like jumps. Water splashes. Hairpins... Yup. Dirt Rally. I love you Dirt Rally. Please racenet, don't be down.