Losing Hell

I've just bought Hell Let Loose - it's a lot of fun but very hard. However, I noticed that voice appeared to randomly work on some servers, but not others. I was watching my FW logs as I was playing the game and adding individual UDP ports in as they showed up as denied.

It seems that the initial voice packet is tried once - if it fails, then the game appears to just give up and doesn't try and send any more on some servers, others it retries on multiple ports (I will say that I haven't analysed the traffic in detail because cba, so this could be other traffic apart from VOIP wrt to retries), so it was generally just a single deny line in the logs. The servers where voice worked, happened to be on one of the ports I'd already allowed. If it didn't... well.

I ditched all the individual ports and put a range in for the game (originally the range was 27000-30000 but that wasn't enough. Edit 3: dropped initial port to 12000 and maxed 32000 as there was a UDP packet at 13950 this morning. A Vivox post below suggested 12K - 32K):

UDP: 12000 - 32000

UDP: 4350 - 4400

20K ports is a fair old range, and now edges Discord with 13,500 ports.

I will update this with a larger range as and when things break.

Note: The policies are from 'Trusted Internal' (i.e. my PC) to 'Any External', as my FW will automatically deny outgoing traffic to a random port somewhere on the internet.

Note 2: Some evidence that this may be your issue, before you try messing about with your FW policies, is if when you press the voice chat keybind, you do not see the little graphic in the bottom left that shows your active mic. It appears that the software tries to send packets before triggering the voice icon on the overlay, so if it cannot do so successfully, then the icon will fail to appear. This appeared consistent across various games when voice did/did not work. If the icon appears, this is probably not your issue.

Note 3: I did notice that my FW was also blocking some traffic due to DDoS protection features. The limits were set at 100 connections/sec (per server/per client quota). I upped this to 500, and the traffic flowed again. I have done no testing on actual rates, so 120 connections/sec might have been enough; I may revise it down when I can be arsed. 100 connections/sec is a fair number, so I was surprised this limit was reached. A note of caution: correlation is not causation, so it might have been a combo of this game and other things too, the game just pushing it over the limit.

Note 4: Even writing (Note 3) made me feel dirty, with such a profligate approach to FW settings. Turns out the traffic limits were being breached by the 'Refresh Server' button, so was fairly easy to iterate over. Reset the 'Per Server' rate limit to 100, and appear to have settled on a figure of 170 connections per second for 'Per Client' quota to stop the packets from being dropped. This makes me feel better. The fact it happens on 'Per Client' leads me to believe that it's not just the game software, but will include other background activity too; but there's no denying that it certainly bursts traffic.

Note 5: Some people have reported having a VPN solves this - this lends credence to me that the problem may lie with a user's gateway hardware firewall/router (where it comes into your house) more. If the VPN from your PC is encrypting traffic in a tunnel straight out of your network, then your hardware firewall cannot interfere with the traffic.

Note 6: This post talks about requiring ports 12000 - 32000 UDP for Vivox, but so far I haven't found any out of the range above. https://sites.google.com/site/tecolaproject/virtualworld/technical-support

Addendum:

I didn't need to check this stuff in this addendum as it seemed to work, but while fiddling about checking out Vivox, there's a customer help page on solving Vivox issues, with a whole suite of checks to run through:

http://vivox.com/gamers/help/19

with this link being the most interesting on how to disable SIP-ALG (Vivox uses SIP apparently) on your router:

https://support.8x8.com/equipment-devices/network-devices/disable-sip-alg-router-firewall

Be interested to see how well it works.

Addendum 2:

This is getting silly. Many games seem to use Vivox, and thus is a SIP based service. Discord does not use SIP, it uses WebRTC, while similar to SIP, just uses whatever protocol the devs choose to deliver the data - in this case, I think Discord rolled their own delivery mechanism, so did not need to use SIP as a protocol. This means that when someone says, 'Discord works, but not this!' - they are comparing Apples to Oranges.

A number of other posts discussing fixes for SIP-based in game voice (for other games like PubG, Foxhole etc. etc.) chat seem to coalesce around disabling SIP-ALG wherever possible on hardware router/firewalls (it works like a kind of NAT, but mangles the endpoint IP address, so delivery fails. As they are all UDP packets, there is no error checking. Why not use TCP! TCP is no good for voice chat, as it takes too long due to the in-built error-checking. You just need a stream of packets as fast as possible.).

King of the Hill

Apex Legends.

I had to upgrade my OS for this. Had been meaning to for ages, but... reinstalling OS' are just tedious. Some friends had said it was pretty good, so thought I'd try it.

It crashed continually on Win 7 - it's 2019, it shouldn't take half an hour to get a game running any more. Turns out it was the OS. So that prompted me to finally get another SSD and rebuild.

So of course, this is another port forwarding post. :)

TCP/UDP: 1024 - 1124, 18000, 29900
TCP: 3216, 9960 - 9969, 18060, 18120, 27900, 28910, 44325
UDP: 37000 - 40000

These ports came from a port forwarding site mostly, so there might be too many. Playing the game, it only appears to use 62384 and 37005 UDP (based on a testing sample of 1 session!) :)

Party to Assassination

Another entry in the port forwarding goodness series.

Spy Party is currently in early access. I first heard about this game some years ago - I want to say 2015 - and purchased alpha/beta ccess as it seemed really interesting. Chris Hecker's games are usually worth a look, as they raise themselves above the standard fare in game design alone.

The steam spiel:

"SpyParty is a competitive espionage game about subtle human behavior. A Spy hides in plain sight at a fancy cocktail party, trying to accomplish missions while blending in with the other guests, while a Sniper with a single bullet looks inward, searching for the Spy."

In reality it's a pretty interesting take on a 2 player asymmetric game, requiring the sniper to take note of activities and goings on at a party, with the spy passing on a codeword to his contact, bugging the ambassador, swapping a statue (presumably for one with a camera in it) and seducing another party attendee. From the sniper's point of view overlooking the room, there a number of tells that may give the game away or at the very least allow the sniper to narrow down the field, all set within a time limit to up the ante for the spy. As the spy, you have your list of missions that you need to complete in as innocuous a way possible to not arouse the sniper's suspicions - completing these actions will produce an action for the sniper to observe - if they're looking in the right place. The set up allows for a complex interplay of subterfuge which can be really absorbing. If you're playing against an experience opponent however, expect to get spotted immediately or not be able to discover the spy as there are a number of ways to spoof actions and throw the scent off or disguise your sniper focus (denoted by a laser sight). By all accounts the community is pretty friendly and help is plentiful and on hand if required.

The discord server is probably your first port of call for information and advice, which can be found here: https://discord.gg/SpyParty

Meanwhile, here are the ports that you may need to open to play MP:

TCP/UDP: 88, 5000
UDP: 7000
TCP: 54784, 54998

Discordant Voices

Next in a slightly irregular series of port forwarding business, Discord chat is most annoying. For reasons best known to the devs, they have chosen a vast port range that voice chat is initiated on - I'm sure there is a very good reason, it's not just them being lazy. Is it?

All kudos to them though, it is one of the best pieces of software to come out in the last few years for gamers. It is pretty much essential, is free (but you can support them and you get animated emojis), and doesn't seem to want to install horrible bits of malware or steal all your data. As a bonus, the patch notes generally have a sense of humour - whilst not going to rival say, Dwarf Fortress, for silliness (which is a big ask), they are at least inventive and may crack a smile, a chance to pat yourself on the back and say, 'I got that reference!'. Top work all round.

Any road, ports required for voice are:

UDP: 50000 - 53500

Earliest Video Game Memory

Way back in the mists of time, men were real men, women were real women and small furry... you get it.

I am old enough to remember an Atari 2600 clone, of sorts.. I don't think it was an Atari, it was wooden, had little silver post slider switches, and two detachable joysticks with a single button apiece (these had little cubby holes to fit into, my first experience with cables just being annoying and never, ever fitting back into the space that they came in when it was new). One of the only games that I distinctly remember was some kind of motorcross game - it might actually have been called 'Motorcross' - where you had three horizontal lines on the TV screen, and your little bike. Pressing the button at the right time made you do a wheelie over an obstacle on the track. I was very bad at games, even back then, and failed more often than I should have. That didn't matter. IT WAS A WONDEROUS THING!

The other was 'Tennis'. Or Pong, but it might not have been branded.

Thinking harder, I seem to remember there only being a few colours. The games on the 2600 seem to be too colourful, maybe it was even older than that. The motorbike game looked like this:

Except that was the bus-jumping game type (one of 4! Stunt Cycle, Motorcross, Drag Race and Enduro). That screen shot comes from the Atari Stunt Cycle Game, which looks like this:

But the console most definitely did not look like that. I could have sworn that it had cartridges - although maybe the games were built in (as were the little joysticks). I'd like to know what it was.

Fortnightly, So Tightly

Following on from Rainbow 6 port discovery, I installed this the other day, and didn't like it much. But, here are the ports that I have opened to get it to work thus far:

UDP: 7862, 9003, 9005, 9013, 9016, 9017, 9022, 9033, 22222

Suspect by looking at the progression that 9000-9035 or something similar are used, but yet to see them.

All Steamed Up

Recently I tightened up my firewall rules. A while back I got hold of a Watchguard T10, nice piece of kit for the home. Turned the wifi off, as already had some Ubiquiti kit in, and that knocks the socks off in-built router wifi, as you might expect.

With the aforesaid tightening, I expected a few teething troubles, but some have manifested in curious ways. Watchguards are good in that they are set up to default block everything incoming but also outgoing - if it doesn't use a common port (i.e. less than 1023), then it will default block outbound traffic.

Examining the logs, I found that some traffic was being blocked by the HTTP Proxy - although the traffic was going out on port 80, it was being denied with the reason: "Body content type match". A bit of research into the error found that the WG was blocking the traffic due to a strange (i.e. whichever game was trying to update) executable dialling out. This is desirable behaviour, clearly, as you don't want some sneaky virus exe dialling home to start cryptolocking all the things. That said, it took a bit of sorting out, so figured I'd write it up for the other 2 people in the world who run home T10s and play steam games.

Firstly, here are the steam ports:

TCP: 27015 - 27030

UDP: 4830, 27000 - 27030

For completeness, here's Valve's IP address space pulled from ARIN:

162.254.192.0/22
192.69.96.0/22
205.196.6.0/24
208.64.200.0/22
208.78.164.0/22
2620:f9::/44

How to fix the HTTP proxy issue:

• Check the policy properties to see which proxy/content action the policy is using, likely to be HTTP-Client.Standard.
• Go into Setup | Actions | Proxies
• Scroll down the list until you see the proxy action you're interested in.
• Edit, and select 'Body Content Types' from the menu on the left.
• Highlight Windows EXE/DLL and ensure that 'If matched' picklist doesn't say 'Deny', 'Drop', or 'Block'. I've chosen AV scan, as I have an active subscription on the T10, but you can also choose 'Allow'.
• OK out and save the config back.
• Enjoy correctly updating Steam games.

Whilst I'm on it as well, here's the (full) list of ports required by Rainbox Six Siege, as the Ubi support pages don't appear to have a complete list:

TCP : 13000, 13005, 13200, 14000, 14001, 14008, 14020, 14021, 14022, 14023, 14024

UDP : 2070, 3075, 3478, 6015, 6019, 6020, 6021, 6250, 6085, 30000, 30100, 30200

Baby Steps

It comes to us all eventually. Most of us. Some. Ok, look, do it if you want to, alright?

Babies. I had to be convinced that they were a good idea. It took a long time, but now the baby is fab. Wish that I'd had one sooner. If only for the reason I'm going to be in a wheelchair when they're running around wanting to do stuff and all the kid's friends will be like, 'Why does your grandpa always pick you up from school?'

Like. Another pet hate, but a verbal habit I can't shake.

I often wonder what I did with all my time before the babe came along and suspect this is a pretty common feeling. Gaming is naturally bottom of the list of priorities. It's a hobby. I think I had come to believe that it was almost a right. A necessity, like electricity. Try telling my wife that - after she's finished laughing, her face will go all serious in the blink of an eye. 'No.'

Be told.

It took me a while to get used to it (not having infinite time for games, not the little one). I don't begrudge it (the time lost, not the little one), in fact. It has actually forced me to rationalise my gaming habit. Only to play what's important to me. To focus on one game rather than chopping and changing, never fully experiencing the game to it's full, wasting money on buying games that I play for an hour - and so on. Has stopped me from spending willfully on Steam sales 'just because it's cheap'. That's a real positive. It goes without saying of course that the main upside is that I have a small, fully functioning autonomous human being to look after and love, a superb replacement.

Pre-baby, I could feel the 'game library dilemma' getting close to a situation that I experienced with my PS1. Before my PS1 was chipped, I invested money (at the time the cost of a game a real consideration), time and enjoyment in a game. Post-chippage, I had a stack of 10 games for cheap (around £3 each) all at once, would play each one for half an hour and then move on, not really enjoying any of them, It was more related to volume of games and time, I think. It's at that point that I stopped bothering to play copied titles and considered which ones I could afford to buy and had much more fun out of them in the long run.

Whilst a baby has really stopped me, I noticed that Steam sales were leading to exactly the same situation. Why buy another game just because it's so cheap when I still have a few others on the go? One only needs to look at common comments about Steam libraries and 'back-catalogues', or use Steam APIs to stalk your friends to see that 2/3 of titles are often unplayed. Not cracked games - just the sheer volume and time required has relegated them to never even being downloaded. Not that Valve cares, of course. Their money trucks just keep rolling in and also includes a nice little piece about why Half-Life 3 will never be made, and once I heard it, I tend to agree with them. Incidentally, a new article about HL3 with an interview from a Valve staffer (allegedly) can be found here. There will be no HL3.

I recently bought Last of Us. Had been wanting to for a loooong time, ever since first hearing about it, but never got around to it. Last of Us 2 was announced just before Christmas, so thought I really ought to make the effort, so I dusted off my PS3, plugged a network cable in and had a look. It was 20 quid for what seemed like everything, DLC and what not. Turns out that I had not logged into PSN for 2 years or so. Slack, eh?

Downloaded LoU and began an install. Apparently, I didn't have enough disk space, so I deleted the 'big' game on my disk, Wipeout HD/Fury - still no space. Ok, deleted all games. Still not enough space. Right. Seeing as I'd not been online for a while, I deleted all save games, game info, the lot. Turns out I was still 700Mb short, as the firmware takes up *just enough* space to stop me installing my new game. Arse.

A short bit of investigation later reminded me that I was still running the HD that the PS3 came with on launch day in 2008 - a (useable) 37Gb. Great. Being somewhat of a geek, I at least didn't have to order a disk, so had a rummage and found a 2" 350Gb drive lying around that merely needed a format. Then the USB drive I put the firmware onto didn't work, so had to find another... aaaaaannd it finally booted. I had a fully updated PS3 and could check out my new game.

Well. Last of Us - what a treat! Not a massive fan of these type of games, as I tend to get bored by them, but in this case, the story was good enough to keep me interested. Better than good actually, it was excellent. Thoroughly enjoyed the play through (although sometimes the clunky movement got up my nose), and, am not ashamed to say it, teared up once or twice. Not many games can claim that. I wondered whether it was because I now had a child of my own that some scenes affected me and suspect so.

Of course, this revitalised PS3 playing has made me look at PS4s. Le sigh. They are ridiculously cheap now for what they are, but still - as I get older I'm starting to feel that 'this one hasn't packed up yet, so I don't need a new one'. But y'know. Western shopping instincts.

I really enjoyed the time on Last of Us, and it was a game that felt like it rewarded the focus, actually gave you a story back with all it's hopes (or lack thereof) and dreams of Ellie & Joel. Pausing to think that this world was all that she knew, not the world that we're all familiar with. What would my child be like in this situation? Would they become infected? How would I deal with it? Could I actually, look them in the eyes and shoot them in the head? Clearly nonsense, but an illustration of the power of the game's environment and story that you find yourself idly thinking about these things whilst making your way around a quieter section of a level. It allows you brain space, isn't a constant shoot and stress factory. In fact, one of my favourite parts of the game comes near the end - and I probably won't be giving anything away here since it's two years old - but as you get to Salt Lake City and see the small Giraffe family, calmly walking around having a graze. Beautiful. You can see the effort that the devs went to with this game - not to belittle the efforts that all developers give in crunch-time - and it really does show. The game timer showed around 20 hours, maybe a little less, spread over 6 weeks or so, and that was the only game that I played. Loved it.

Little ones sure do reduce your game time, but if I'm brutally honest, I think it's actually made me appreciate games more. That and having an hilarious little person running around doing funny shit.

Philistines

Lists. We humans love lists. Particularly journalists, and to sub-divide and specialise further, games journalists. If I was being uncharitable, I would say because it's easy copy. But hey, it's generating copy here too and probably worse writing to boot (and they at least have the excuse of people reading it). Self pity and whining kids, don't do it.

ANYWAY to move on; it's frustrating, as I'd like to read some interesting content in this otherwise moribund period that isn't simply looking back - even RPS succumbed (although I think they went off the boil about 12-18 months ago).

So on top of all the past year's lists are the ones dealing with the 12 months ahead. The gift that keeps on giving - as you have to bookend the year, right?

What seems conspicuously absent from all of these (ok, almost all. I confess I haven't looked at everything) is Thimbleweed Park. A simple, point & click adventure game, exactly like all the ones we used to love from yesteryear - but with all the crucial lessons that we've learned (for example not killing the player at every opportunity - I'm looking at you, Ken & Roberta) along with a strong story backbone.

Thimbleweed Park is being headed by none other than Ron Gilbert & Gary Winnick. Ron bloody Gilbert! Fresh out of Double Fine, he put together a team and started knocking one out. Then he got down to writing some code.

For those that aren't aware (and if you play games what on earth have you been doing?), Ron & Gary wrote Maniac Mansion for Lucasfilm Games (latterly Lucasarts). The framework Gilbert created to actually make MM was called SCUMM - Script Creation Utility for Maniac Mansion - and went on to be used for nearly every later Lucasarts adventure game title. These are some of the best loved games in the genre - Monkey Island et al.

Thimbleweed Park started life as a kickstarter and did well itself, possibly given life by the huge success of Tim Schafer's Broken Age - although not to Broken Age's levels - and is due for release this year. I don't support many games via kickstarter, as it is after all a gamble, with the only few that come to mind that I have backed (mainly via Early Access) being Prison Architect, Satellite Reign, Dirt Rally and Formula Fusion. (If you want an investment with potential return, head over to Gambitious or Schafer's own Fig. Value of your shares can go down as well as up yada yada yada). Thimbleweed Park, though! I had to. I just had to. Even if the early support came to naught, I could deal with it. It's one of the few blogs that I visit regularly, and of late, it's been a weekly click. The game is getting close now, has apparently reached the stage where features, puzzles and content are all largely locked and they're all working feverishly to de-bug and finalise it. May I? Yes, I think I may. SQUEEEEEE! Apologies. Release date roughly Feb/March.

What is it? It's an old-fashioned adventure game that looks really pixel-y. So what, huh? The best thing about this format is that you can't hide behind flashy graphics - the story has to be strong. The game will stand or fall on the quality of the narrative (barring some glaring design faults). Messrs Gilbert and Kinnick have great form. Hmm? The art? Get with the program, pixel art is all the rage.

The game opens with a murder in the small town of Thimbleweed Park, and 2 detectives have been given the case. Outside town, a family are gathering to hear a will from a rich uncle. Meanwhile, a clown has been cursed and can't remove his makeup whilst another character wakes up and realises that he's dead.

Whether you give a shit about this game will depend strongly if you're of a certain age, I suppose. When Monkey Island came out (I never had a computer that could run Maniac) it was on a number of 1.44Mb HD floppies, I forget how many, although I want to say 4. Monkey Island 2 was 8 maybe? 10? Whatever. Breathlessly, I awaited the delivery and put each diskette into my dad's 12MHz 286 (1Mb RAM! 30Mb HDD!) and booted the game. The copy protection was a typically inventive dial-a-pirate code wheel. The game delivered! [For an interesting series on copy protection in game, head on over to The Digital Antiquarian - great blog. Read it all if you have any interest in the history of computer games & games in general. Set aside a few weeks.]

The game was funny, involving, hard (to 15 year old me) and exciting. I'd never seen anything like it, all my previous 'interactive fiction' needs being serviced by Infocom. I was hooked. MI2, Indiana Jones and the Fate of Atlantis, Sam & Max, DotT, Fandango (along with other outfits' efforts, Space Quest, Kings Quest, Gabriel Knight) - etc.

Then there was the drought. Around the mid-nineties, the genre appeared to die a death, and not without reason. Graphics processing was coming on apace, storytelling was advancing and action games were deemed to be more exciting. What are these games that helped in the decline? Well, that would be Doom and Half-Life. No introduction needed (if they do, hand in your gaming card right naow.) As the millennium turned, the main stalwart of the genre, Lucasarts, threw in the towel. Some developers kept on producing, but there were no breakout hits; as the 2000s marched along, digital distribution appeared and saw an upswing in episodic content. Telltale Games was formed by ex-Lucasartisans, bought some rights from Steve Purcell and released Sam & Max Save The World, which did respectably well as an episodic series. Telltale worked hard, and released a number of adventure games until there was a market again! Re-mastered versions of the Lucasarts' classics did reasonably well and then Gilbert clearly thought it was time to re-enter the fray. Am I glad he did.

So that little background story was nowhere near as short as I wanted it to be, but it will hopefully give some indication with the enthusiasm with which I am awaiting Thimbleweed Park.

And it wasn't mentioned in a single list. Tchoh.

Eventually You Will Succumb

Eve Online. The one MMO to rule them all. Death has meaning here. It's tough, uncompromising, with few rules (beyond gaming the game and actively stealing accounts) and is designed to be flexible and player-owned and run to some extent, with them making the laws. Or not. More often not, come to think of it.

Much has been written about Eve. Not least this gloriously full colour early history of the game, 'Empires of Eve'. Funny story about that actually...  heard about the book from /r/eve. It wasn't sold in the UK, although the author did state that if there was enough demand, then he would do something over here. I couldn't wait for this, of course. Oh no. So me, thinking I was clever, found a friendly American to send it to, who would then send it on. I didn't specify the way he would send it, but him being kind, assumed that I would want it as soon as possible. Doom! He fed-ex'd it. Postage cost, £109, with a receipt to prove it. My book had now cost me over £130.

Of course, as you are no doubt aware if you bothered to follow the link above, it is now available in the UK. Go me.

So anyway. The first time I tried Eve, I think I lasted approximately 5 minutes, as I undocked and looked at the UI. I couldn't really be arsed. On reflection it might have been better to leave it there.

Second time around, I had become more and more interested in it - because space and general stories of skulduggery - and a colleague at my work (same company, different team) played it, had been talking about it for a while. It sounded great - but not wishing to repeat the WoW experience, I deliberately kept away.

I eventually caved, and was in 'highsec' (the so-called safe area of the game) and joined a corporation (equivalent to WoW's guilds). Didn't really get on with them so tapped up my friend. His corp lived in 'nullsec' (the really no-holds-barred deadly area of the game) so I made preparations to move down there a mere 3 weeks after starting the game. He was guiding me through, except, at the crucial point I misunderstood his instruction to not enter the stargate as to enter it. There was, sadly, a 'gatecamp', set up by a gang of space pirates to separate people from their internet spaceships with as little fuss as possible. Duly separated from all my worldly goods, my toon came back to life where I'd started. The second try was a lot more successful, and the corp replaced my losses (as in the scheme of things it cost nothing to them).

And so began another glorious chapter of computer game addiction and time wasting. (There has been some writing that takes umbrage with using the word 'addiction'. I've used it for years, but appreciate why not. Addiction destroys lives, for me it's mere compulsion. I digress.)

Eve really hit my gaming time hard. The concept of 'death' within the game was dealt with by the Eve pilots being clones, you die, you wake up where you've set your home station (minus any brain implants). That said, the ship you were in, and all it's hold contents, are lost. They can get quite expensive, and seeing how time spent in the game is how you generally earn money, losing your craft and possessions actually means something.

In a fight, there were only 3 ways it could generally end: either party could escape, you win or you lose. The fights also generally only last a few seconds, but in that time and in the pursuit or flight if you're trying to catch/evade someone, your heart is pumping like it wants to jump out of your chest, your hands are going clammy, youforgetwhichbuttontopressandohmygod...

Post fight, you have all the marks of adrenaline fade, the shakes, the pale face; if nothing else, it's that intense feeling of excitement that kept me coming back again and again (and again) to Eve. Not many games do that to me - one other that springs to mind is Company of Heroes (vCoH) - a hard fought 40 minute online 2v2 on 'Rails & Metal' when I emerged at the end of the game drenched in sweat, hurting to blink because my eyes have dried out and mild exhaustion from concentration; a nice sit down with a cup of tea is in order. Perhaps even a slice of cake. Not even sure if I won that CoH game or not, it's the memory of the match itself that sticks. That is also my abiding memory of Eve.

One fight that I will always remember... I was flying around in my Wolf (a moderately expensive frigate) trying alternately to find/not be found by a Succubus (a very expensive frigate). He found me and caught me. I was shitting it, locked him (a necessary game mechanic to ensure your guns can target a ship), opened fire, turned armour repairers on when needed and prepared to die. Something was wrong. I wasn't dying. I began to slowly break his tank. This is it! I'm winning! Here we go! Payday! At which point he left the field with 'gf' ('Good Fight') in local (local space chat channel). What the-- I was winning! My first 1v1 and I was winning! And he left! Well of course he did. I had forgotten to turn on my warp disrupter (Eve's method for preventing escape), as I'd been concentrating on staying alive and killing him. Shucks. Chalk it up to experience, and go for a lie down.

Eve is also so much more than fighting. CCP (the developers) designed the game as a 'sandbox', where they set up the rules of the universe, and left the players to it. There have been mercenary outfits, banks, lottery syndicates, alliances, year long wars, trading and territory empires and scams. Mostly scams and alliance fights if I'm honest.

The beauty of Eve is that the economy was run for the players by the players - and as such proved to be somewhat of a microcosm of real-world economics - CCP employed an economics professor for a good few years to oversee the economy. The base of the economy, the 'money drip' if you like, that CCP set up was mostly driven by mining, specifically moon mining. Some moons in nullsec held the rarest of minerals that naturally commanded the highest price - if you control that space, then you gain the resources. So it comes down to territorial battles driving the economy - you lose ships, you need to build more, you need to build more, you need minerals... and so on.

Internet spaceships is srsbsns. o7.

Warcrack

World of Warcraft eh? WoW.

This game is one of the biggest, best known contemporary MMOs [Massively Multiplayer Online game] still running. Relationships have flowered and cracked from this particular niche hobby (although 10 million unique players at it's peak maybe isn't strictly 'niche'). There's now a movie about the game and it's lore. Not seen it, can't tell you if it's any cop.

A lot of my current (online) friends play this. I keep firmly away from it, and I shall tell you why.

Back in 2004 I started work at a new job, it was a new team within that business, so everyone was new to the new team. Newness abounded. If you pulled your shoulders back and inhaled, you could almost imagine that 'new' smell. It was that new.

One of my (new) colleagues played a bit of Warcraft, and we got on quite well. One day, he loaned me his account (not strictly allowed) so I could create a new toon whilst recovering from a hangover at his flat. WTF was this game? This was incredible! It knocks CS [Counter Strike] into a cocked hat!

Clearly this is untrue, I have much love for CS, but WoW was like the fresh and fly new kid at school, wearing box-fresh Run DMC Superstars and a VW pendant. (Not trendy? I'm older than you, it was once. Fuck you).

The term 'toon' is a (presumably, no-one really seems sure) derivative of cartoon, used to describe the character the player is currently using in the game. Some hardcore players maybe don't like it, as it implies a disconnect between the character and user, with the potential to dispel any atmosphere that the game creates. I'm just using it because I'm lazy and to provide a modicum of lexical variety.

To roll back a little, for non-aficionados, an MMO is a game where many players can take part in the same game world, they appear on each other's screens and can interact with one another. Warcraft is 'sharded' - that is, you create your toon on that server, and you are 'locked' to that server (but you can move your character for a fee). Each server has the same copy of the current patch of the game and the technique is generally done to maintain performance.

It is this interaction with one another and the content that the developers produce that provides much of the draw. You can do a quest, and if you're struggling, can ask for some help from other players. If it goes well, more quests are completed with them and from there go on to maybe join a guild (player run groups with similar aims). Quests will give you 'loot' - parlance for new weapons, armour and other items - and to gain levels to make your character more powerful. As you gain levels, the spells and weapon effects you may use become stronger and longer lasting.

Once the guild is big enough, and your toons are high enough level, you can organise to do a 'raid' - that is an event that has a specific sub-plot or story that can only be completed as a group. Raids are vary in difficulty up to extraordinarily challenging, requiring 40 people to be on top of their game and fulfilling a specific role, be it healer, damage dealer, spell caster etc.

As I started the game, I chose Horde (the bad guys) and an undead warlock. I have usually favoured spell casters in these type of games, maybe because I always liked the mysterious air that Raistlin usually cultivated. That and he was a total bastard. Roleplaying is supposed to be fun!

I enjoyed the early quests, 'Go here, kill some boars, collect their teeth and I will give you this blessed shoelace' for what they were (training), and progressed into the more deadly areas of the game.

My friend wanted his laptop back, so I went straight into town, bought a copy of the game (with it's free month of game time)... and lost the next 3 weeks. I would come home from work, go straight upstairs to my PC, boot the game and sit there until midnight. 6 hours per night, and it still wasn't enough. In quiet times at work, I'd look at item builds and skill progression, and watch the clock for home-time. Weekends, I'd play until very late, rise late and get straight on it, sit there all day. I used to get phone calls from a friend, asking me to come round for tea (dinner for non-Brits) or a beer or whatever, I'd turn her down as I was too busy. Those animated tree saplings weren't going to kill themselves you know!

I was enjoying the game, but was starting to find that the quests were all fairly similar. Go here, collect these, kill that and so on. I was continually told that the game came alive at level 60 (the top level at the time). I was 22. Why wasn't the game alive already? And yet, I couldn't stop playing. The burn to get that next level was so cleverly wrought into the game, it was irresistible. Must get that spell. Must get that item. The developers had clearly spent some time with psychologists.

Pretty soon, you need to chose a profession. In WoW, a profession allows you gain a particular skill, jewelcrafting, fishing etc. so that you can get items that will help you on your quests. I'd heard fishing was a good one, easy to do and helpful... and this was where I started to take a long hard look at myself.

Fishing in wow consisted of learning the skill from an NPC [Non-Player Character] and buying a fishing rod. Click on some water and you will cast your line, a progress bar appears and empties on the screen. If your fishing float bobs, click on it. Ta-da! You're a fisherman!

Fuck me. That was boring. Part of the aforementioned navel gazing was the realisation that I'm spending time on a game (that I'm paying for) to watch a timer bar empty to get some fish gills or whatever. What on earth are you doing.

That was it. 3 weeks in, in an unprecedented display of strong character I stiffed my upper lip and quit the game. Generally, I know what I'm like (weak-willed lily-livered decision recanter), so I changed the email address of the account to one I no longer knew the password for, then changed the password on the account to something random which I would forget. Uninstalled the game, burned the CD key and snapped the install disks. There was no way I could install that game without buying another copy.

For the next week I was depressed and moody. Cold turkey was the only way, and after a while, I was glad that I was out from under the game's shadow.

I was free. Until I found Eve Online.

Get Back, Blackguard!

So, Dishonored 2 is out soon. Talking to a friend about it, I was reminded what a superlative game it was. Incredible level design allowed you a true decision in what path to take. Certain choke-points to take you through to the next sub-section, but other than that there was often 3, sometimes 4 different ways to achieve your objective. Sneak, kill, distract, possess, blink...

It's been about 3 years, I can't really remember the details of the story, it would be good to do it again. Was it ever!

You invest Corvo Attano, the Royal Bodyguard. The opening sequence deals with your titular misfortune - a dastardly plot that pits you against the powerful senior members of society in the city of Dunwall. Pretty soon you link up with the Loyalists, a group of concerned citizens fighting to save the Royal Progression and leverage power from the veiny mitts of the plotters. You are also chosen to be the Outsider's champion, the patronage of whom gives you supernatural powers... pretty soon Corvo is embroiled deeply into plots within plots, as the game's story plays out across the industrial cityscape.

As these types of games go, the story is pretty decent (if at times predictable)- you care (at least, I did!) about the characters, cheering some and booing the delightfully pantomime villains of the piece. As the game goes on, you meet more principles, get to know older ones better, and by your actions in the game alter those people's attitude towards you. I think Samuel was my favourite, and remember feeling singularly disappointed in myself at his later disparagement. I was a Bad Man(tm).

Although you have obtained the right to use your powers, the game doesn't hand them to you on a platter - The Outsider's tokens must be hunted down to increase your abilities - you are given some at the start to get you going, but if you want more, you're going to have to work for it. It's a really nice design balance that shows up some games' achievements for collecting as simple Magpie Moments. At the same time, it encourages exploration and consideration as opposed to speed running, something I've never really been a massive fan of (or indeed, any good at). These powers never feel unbalanced really either - you could, if you so wished, not bother with any of the more powerful abilities (barring blink), and survive on your wits alone - but this game is to be played and I would rather not torture myself with the frustration. Especially if attempting the non-lethal route. (I do have a small whinge here - I was never able to work out where to hide the bodies if I had knocked them out rather than made them vanish, always got tagged for it on the end of level tally). The final supernatural aids that you are given are runes, which are incremental upgrades to various parts of your arsenal, carved out of whalebone.

Also worth a mention is the voice acting. It is brilliant. I'd forgotten how great it was, and on a few occasions thought I recognised a voice, looked it up and it was them. There is some serious voice talent in this game, which really adds to the atmosphere - Brad Dourif in particular stands out for me.

The backdrop of the city is richly detailed; a civilisation powered by whale oil, steampunk contraptions abound, a hard life for most with the extraction and hunting of the whales pretty unpleasant (with indications of them getting more rare). Arkane clearly took great pains to paint a vivid picture, plenty of background snippets to read all add to the excellent atmosphere.

I enjoyed it so much the second time around that I ended up buying some DLC - The Knife of Dunwall, aka 'Daud's Story'. Daud is the head of an assassin's guild, and he's feeling guilty, Ladies and Gentlemen. He's having doubts about also being a Bad Man (tm) and your task is to salve his soul. You are given somewhat of a different choice of powers (although disappointingly the runes don't seem to have changed much). There is a second add-on called The Brigmore Witches, where Daud again tries to prevent another gang from sealing his fate (at the hands of Corvo) with a powerful ritual.

I will probably wait before I get Dishonored 2 (because DotA), but I will look forward to playing it. If this genre rocks your world and the quality holds, it should be great. A cut above.

Dote you want me baby

Sim racing. It filled my gaming time for a good few months with thrills and spills, ditches, rocks and the odd tree. Dirt Rally however, has got a bit old for me. Codemasters did a sterling job with the game, and bringing out new cars as free DLC as promised (that all handled differently), but sadly no new tracks. Understandable really, the lengths that they went to to make the stages just so was nothing short of heroic. That shit costs money, and lots of it. That's one reason.

The other is that there's no time now. There's only DotA.

According to DotaBuff, I first had a game in February/March 2014, and only 3 games at that. I probably got yelled at for feeding, not levelling my abilities properly, not buying wards, hell, not buying items. Who the hell needs items anyway. Not this cancerous feeder. I can only assume it was uninstalled in disgust at the toxicity of the community, none of which was my fault oh-dear-me-no. The next time I had a go was when The International 4 rolled around - I enjoyed watching the pros play, and they (Valve) set up a noob stream to basically explain what the eff was going on. Playing wise, I lasted a single game.

The International is Valve's yearly 'main event' for DotA; the best teams from around the world gather together to compete in a tournament with a prize pool that grows bigger every year - nearly $11 million in 2014 (over $20 million 2016). It's is partly funded by players buying skins and a 'compendium' (then), 'battlepass' (now) containing loot, quests and what-not from Valve, and 25% of the purchase price of these goes towards the prize pool.

July 2015 - TI5 was getting nearer, shit I'd better have another crack at this game. Figure it out once and for all. This time I did it properly, advertised on Dotafire as a noob, LFG. Some experienced players picked me up and taught me the basics, and put up with my shit. It was so much more fun. They were all far, far above me in MMR (MatchMaking Ranking, DotA ELO effectively), so whilst I enjoyed the experience mostly, and we were in a 5 stack so I didn't get continually griefed, the games were hard. I was with 2 year old players, against 2 year old players, and still feeling my way like Captain Michaelus Raphael prowling the Sin of Damnation. You want over-wrought similes? This is the spot.

I played for longer, watched the streams for longer, understood barely half of it. Soldiered on for a few months, made it until the end of November when I played 10 games in one session and lost 7. I think my new found friends finally got sick of me, because I started to get mildly frustrated comments like, 'Why were you there? What were you doing? You should be here. P-p-p-ping!' Small potatoes in DotA insult-world that, but I quietly let the game finish, and then quit. Deleted them off my friends list, sold all my skins and uninstalled it. Fuck that game. Fuck them. I don't need that shit.

August 2016. TI6. Shit me, this game looks great. Why don't I still play it? This time. This time, I will bend this game to my will. Played a few matches, then absorbed myself in TI. The production quality was incredible - all credit to Valve, the production team and the commentators, they really pulled out all the stops. For example, if you'd bought a Vive headset, you could spectate in VR; I nearly bought one for just that! I steeled my will, and rode out the consumer desire. TI6 has been the best yet - here's the ending of a tightly fought game between Digital Chaos and Evil Geniuses.

This time I had a clue what was going on, I could follow the main stream, and didn't really need the noob one. I still missed some of the more esoteric details, but it was mostly there. I've noticed since then that my play has improved - I can last hit (sorta). I can support. I can ward. I can't pull yet, still keep forgetting, but meh. Muscle memory isn't there in a team-fight panic, but that's why I'm low MMR (720-odd). And you will panic.

This game has really got it's claws into me now. I try and at least play once an evening, twice if I'm lucky, time permitting. I'm definitely improving, my opponents are clearly better - and I need to get better to best them. The eternal challenge. The itemisation is still a struggle, still working from online builds mostly, but beginning to understand why I might choose the Heart of Tarrasque over Shiva's Guard in late game, for example. Solo queue does suck though; I try to remain positive, if there's any salt from team-mates to team-mates, I try and mediate, head it off - after all, criticism will only make that player play tilt more, and then you're really boned. Seems to work to some extent. My win rate is creeping up - 46.58% (out of 307 games), up from the doldrums of 44.67%. That's right, I've never claimed to be any good.

I'm digging this game, it feels as though I've crested a hump. I'd go as far to say that the DotA2 learning curve is akin to Eve Online's:



I love that pic.

I've still got a lot to learn. I still feed when I try a new toon. BUT! I can see when people are doing strange things... abstractly, my game-sense has improved. My MMR, KDA, GPM and XPM are all creeping up. I'm getting used to the blink dagger. I will never be pro, clearly. Those guys are all late teens to mid 20s, with reactions like cats.

I'd be happy with an MMR of 1500. For an introduction to the game, you could do worse than checking out Purge's 'Welcome to DotA. You suck'.

He's right. You will.

Running in circles

Seeing as I now have a wheel, I need to find games that I can use it with. Briefly toyed with the idea of attempting to use it playing Rainbow 6: Siege. Left and right to strafe, accelerate and brake forward and backwards. Gear up - iron sights, gear down, fire. Myriad of buttons to choose from to chuck grenade, use special. I think it would be hilarious for the first 5 minutes, then deeply frustrating. It's not an easy game at the best of times and quite unforgiving. Not to mention immensely irritating for your teammates. Now a whole *team* using steering wheels could be brilliant. Both teams even! The challenge would be to *do something meaningful* before the clock ran out.

[I have since tried it, and it was a disaster, and my team got rather salty. Quelle surprise. Hello internet.]

I digress. Racing sims seem to do some things well but not others - there's no one game that does it all. As soon as someone cracks that one, Steam will need to upgrade it's 100GB network again.

In the meantime, here are the choices that I've managed to drag together:
Project Cars (PC) - not bad, some hold it in little regard due to feelings of it being unfinished with lots of bugs whilst [paid] dlc is released, expensive for what it is (currently £50 on steam). Friends tell me it's great fun, v2 is on the way (12 months away perhaps).
Assetto Corsa (AC) - gorgeous, hot lapping game. Physics great, AI not bad, not so good online I'm told, low content.
Raceroom Racing Experience (R3E) - free (initially), incredible sound - tried one car, and could instantly match the straight cut gearbox with my Westfield's noise. Engine noise fab too. Ludicrous pricing model, as all but the most basic cars will cost you. (Car cost ranges from 2 - 5 Euros, some tracks extra, total cost around 100 Euros).
Iracing - excellent online racing due to regular policing and effective punishment above rookie level (enforced by your real name), subs, could be expensive, continual updates. Difficult. Also, you have to join the race's time, rather than just logging on any old time - a natural solution to a global racer, but difficult if you only have a certain amount of time to race at different times.
Rfactor2 - professional physics package, gfx not so hot, fairly reasonable price, long support tail.
Stock car extreme - quite highly regarded, if little known; the name belies the game content, as it's far more than just the title suggests. Brazilian based, so different tracks. Running an older game engine (understand it's Rfactor1 but modded and updated), cheap, lots of cars... and theres a new game coming out called Autmobilista, Q1 2016. One to keep an eye out for.
Copa petrobas - free, but reportedly suffers from complexity on setup.

I've been umm-ing and ah-ing over choosing one of these, but can't make my mind up. I've (so far) played 3 of them, Iracing, AC and R3E. Why just one? Well my playtime is fairly limited these days, so dilution is not really wanted. Plus, I don't want to spend all that cash (and it would add up quickly) to end up in a similar situation as when I bought 5 PS1 games for a tenner years ago: I only played each one for an hour or so before going onto the next, never really getting into any.

After chatting to some steam friends, who I knew to be very much into sim racing, I was given straightforward advice from a Fin - PC is shit, AC is ok, R3E is ok, Iracing is where it's at. As I'd been prevaricating for about a week now, I figured I should just do *something*. Make a decision. Any decision.

Iracing has an unusual install. After being spoon-fed with games for so long, there are a few more steps to take with this. Quite familiar with ./configure and makefiles on Linux, but faced with a Windows desktop, I just want to click that little .exe and not think. This is your first warning that Iracing is not your 'normal game'.

Iracing is also bewilderingly complex at first, not helped by the fact that it launches from the browser. A browser interface that is really cluttered and, well, awful. Before the first run through on the practice lap: calibrate wheel and field of view [FOV], check default FFB [Force FeedBack] settings. The second inkling that Iracing was bonkers was that it required me to input the size of my monitor (why not grab from Windows?) and how far I sit from it. This will then give you the FOV for the game, or, how much you can see of the car through the window. FFB settings need referring to the Iracing forums and reading lots. In fact, all of it requires reading quite a lot. This is not a Forza where you choose a car, track, and jump right in to lap your opponents' laughable times. This is srs bsns. If you're not fully sold on how detailed this game is, a further example: a friend who is *really* into flight sims (as in has a VR insight control box, X55 Hotas stick for MSFX) said that Iracing is 'pretty involved'.

So! Now I'm on track, in the advised MX5. Other advice included, 'Don't go online until you can go round a track without spinning off'. How hard could that be? It turns out, very. There is a racing line to use, but it's better to turn it off, no matter how beguiling, as you learn the tracks faster. There are other things to think about, such as rubber build-up on the racing line. I kid you not.

The sim has a few cars and tracks available, but they are not cheap - around 12USD per car/track. So, a high up-front cost (in addition to the subscription), but once you have all the tracks, you're well on the way. Bulk buy discounts are available.

R3E is a free install, but with paid microtransactions. A *lot* of paid microtransactions. Again, you have volume discounts, and others if you already own a form of the car in another class. As mentioned above, the sounds are excellent. Adds a lot to the experience and immersion. The driving model seems quite good, although I had it set on 'Amateur' rather than 'Real', and the AI set low. Graphics are pretty good too. Although it was free, I didn't want to get too into buying cars and tracks just yet.

Assetto Corsa, this was probably my strongest choice. The graphics are gorgeous, the interface, less so. When playing at 1440p, the menus are all crushed up into the centre of the screen. That quibble aside, the game plays well. It *is* more of a hot-lapping sim though, and is the one I eventually went for.

The tracks are good, I couldn't attest to their accuracy, although I can only assume that it's pretty close, otherwise you'd hear the outcry in Italy. The handling model seems fine (to my untrained hands), although there seems to be slightly too much FFB. The game does seem a little too willing to vibrate that thang sometimes. Once you get going, the game is very smooth, feels very competent, and the hot-lapping keeps you on it to better that time. I believe the developers are working on making the 'career mode' a little more fleshed out. Some hours in, it feels like there's something missing... like jumps. Water splashes. Hairpins... Yup. Dirt Rally. I love you Dirt Rally. Please racenet, don't be down.

Forced off

The FFB [Force Feed Back] is a success! The FFB is a failure.Not really sure which, if I'm honest. So what now?

This can't be uncommon. I touched on it last post about not being an immediate driving god, but thought after a few days it would become at least a little more clear. What does FFB actually mean? By now I feel that I have a firm grasp of how a car is meant to behave in corners, due to actual driving, things that I've read over the years, but also the Advanced Driving courses that my dad put me through when I was a new driver. This course came with - and this sounds better than it is - 'The Police Drivers' Handbook', at the time I excitedly opened it, anticipating lots of blurb about how to drive safely during pursuits - but no. There was lots of dryness about sight pictures, phases of car control, road position (but all useful), and slightly more interesting things about tyre-grip trade-off, skidding, cornering forces and what-have-you.

For those of who you aren't familiar with that, the upshot is that there's only so much grip available to the 4 little patches of rubber that join your car to the road along with the slightly less surprising revelation that the car weighs down on those same patches. When proceeding in a straight line at a constant speed the car weight is evenly distributed; all grip is available for acceleration and/or braking. When you accelerate, the weight shifts backwards so there is more of the car on 2 of the (rear) patches and transfers forwards when you brake; when cornering, the car's weight migrates to the left or right side (opposite to turning direction) as well as some of that grip being used to turn the car, so there's correspondingly less available for everything else as well. If one were to then brake in a corner, all the car's weight is now one 1 little patch, potentially leaving you in a situation where you might exceed the grip available (and thus have no control over your direction). The idea is that you get all your braking and gear changing done before entering the corner in order to stay well within the grip limit and keep the car balanced. On the road, you shouldn't really be getting near the limit of adhesion under normal conditions. It does happen though - I'll put that down to youthful exuberance leading to a sudden loss of talent. Thankfully no injury.

Those techniques, while handy on the road for 'safe progress', are a lot more useful on the track, as you get much closer to the limit on nearly every corner. It is more secure on a track (to a degree) as there's no oncoming traffic, but a corresponding lure to push the car and thus overcook it and do something expensive. Not to mention being banned from the event for the rest of the day if you can still drive it, cost of potential fluid clean up; worst-case scenario, colliding with someone else's pride and joy. Don't do that, there'll be tears before bedtime. And solicitors' fees.

Ok, so I have some understanding of real world car physics. Can I translate that to a virtual track? Can I chuff. What gives? Have I been fiddling with the wheel settings too much? The G29 rumbled and shuffled in my hands, but I still have no idea how to relate to it. Dirt Rally was getting a little frustrating if I'm honest, so I decided to reset everything to default and it was then that I began to associate the spitting and shoving to what was happening on the screen. It was a bit of a lightbulb moment having not really experienced a wheel up until now - 'Ahah! So THAT'S what it [the FFB] means!'. It was while doing the Dirt Daily, in the Lancia 037 EVO 2 (Group B RWD category) - a tricksy beast. Cresting a rise, the steering went light, landing and it went heavy - THEN is the time to tweak your direction and get a good look at that beautiful bark texture up close, shortly before being obscured by steam.

So yes, is the answer. I had been fiddling with the settings too much before even knowing what the default information it was giving me meant. It's not surprising I was Driving Miss Daisy to stay on the track.

Now to see if I can keep that fupping MX-5 on Laguna Seca.

Toe dipping into Sim Racing.

I've always liked racing games. From Outrun in the arcades, Road Rash around friends' on the Megadrive, Test Drive, Lotus Esprit Challenge, Stunt Car Racer and Super Sprint on the Amiga/ST, the odd bit of MarioCart, Gran Turismo on the PS1... you get the idea. One thing that pervaded them all was that I was never very good at them but loved them just the same. When Forza arrived on the Xbox, I was astounded at the quality, excited at online racing possibilities, inevitably being outclassed by nearly everyone. I let things lapse after that, with the occasional foray into Burnout, Burnout Paradise, Grid 1 and 2, Dirt and Forza series as it incremented... And so on.

Thinking back, the thing that turned me off Forza was the setups. I got into that. REALLY into that. I made a spreadsheet where you could plug the car, surface, track, conditions into it and it would spit out the settings. It got to the point where I enjoyed tweaking that and checking out manufacturers' gear ratios to make the handling 'just so' more than the game itself - which it burned me out so I chucked the lot in.

Fast forward a few years, a few little PC upgrades and then out of nowhere in late April Codemasters released a new Rally game into EA [Early Access]. Their stated goal was to ditch all the flashy razzmatazz that characterised earlier titles in the series and get down to brass tacks, personally something I'd been wanting since playing Richard Burns Rally and Colin McRae on PS1; arguably they have largely succeeded. Reviews were mostly praiseworthy with only PCGamer's write-up slating the cars for feeling very similar - the experienced simracer they'd employed for the piece otherwise seemed to enjoy it however.

Sometimes EA can be a bit of a punt and I have been burned once or twice, but this looked too good to resist especially without the normal fanfare associated with new games these days. I was pretty much instantly sold! Since then I've put about 100 hours in it (for reference, the only other games that have held my attention for that long are Counter Strike, Company of Heroes, Dota2, Eve and TF2, so definitely in some exalted company) and playing it with a joypad. I desperately wanted a FFB [Force Feed Back] steering wheel to play it, but couldn't really justify spending so much on a peripheral that I may use in only one game, and maybe I wouldn't like Dirt.

Dirt was great. Dirt was mighty. Dirt was great fun! These 100 hours have convinced me that it wouldn't be a waste of money - in that I would actually use it, not let it gather dust; let's not get into a discussion about expensive gaming peripherals being a 'real-world' waste of money - so I started looking at getting a wheel more seriously than the dreamy, 'Oo that would be nice' that one occasionally indulges in.

Then there was the choice - whilst not wanting to spend about 50 quid (I have a perceived version of quality below a certain amount, arbitrarily arrived at around £100), the obvious contenders were Logitech's G-series, Thrustmaster T-series and Fanatec. The G-series come in a roughly the middle price bracket of all steering wheels on offer,



slightly higher you have the Thrustmaster T-series and higher still, the Fanatec. The main difference between these is that Logitech's are mechanical and the latter two makes are belt driven; aficionados will tell you that belt drive is the way forward - it's smoother, quieter and more 'detailed'. However, there's a price consideration: the T150



and T300



are fairly reasonably priced but only come with two pedals and no shifter, whereas I'd convinced myself with that impeccable logic you find from somewhere that a 3 pedal system was a minimum consideration. The full-fat experience T500



will set you back ~£350-£380; add in the H-gate shifter, and you're looking at £500.



The Fanatec system is a whole different cricket pitch. Clearly this gear is top notch, with a price tag to go with it, as can be evidenced by the Fanatec site. You don't just buy the 'wheel', it's all modular. By that I mean, you buy the servo (the FFB motor), then a wheel design that you like, then the pedals and finally the shifter. The absolute bottom dollar seems to be €1000 but if you go for the best of everything, and throw in a seat (why wouldn't you at this stage), it will set you back around €3000. Not insignificant. Marriage-destroyingly expensive perhaps.



Not wanting to spend your average month's salary on a peripheral, nor a weekly one for that matter, I looked at buying a Logitech - the latest iteration (designated G29) was £300 new, with shifter £350. One could argue that that was similar to the T500 - and yes, it is, but I still didn't want to spend that much, so with a budget of £150-200 ish I began looking at 2nd hand last generation G-series wheels on ebay. The G25 and G27 are exceptionally highly regarded as a rule, and command a used price to match, roughly £180. Then the usual doubts started to creep in - how hard a life have they had? How reliable will the mechanical innards be after a few years? Should I just get a new one?

After a few failed bids on ebay (including one guy that I suspected was shilling me), I eventually noticed the Currys/PC World sale: a brand-new G29 for £160. It was in the price range that I wanted to pay and was not used. Result. Ok, so the previous iterations come with shifters, and I would have to buy it separately, but even so, it came in only slightly over my budget if the shifter was added. As it happened, in the interests of thrift, I felt that I could get by without the shifter for now. Decision made! Ridiculous peripheral ordered!

The grand day came. It was unwrapped. It was installed. It was plugged in, initially forgetting to turn it on, as the gears and brake worked, but not the wheel. Dirt Rally was played. I was still rubbish. 

Clearly this wheel was not going to make me a driving god overnight but surely my times should be better than this? After all, this is like a *real* car, wheel, brakes and whatnot. Well, no. It turns out that joypad muscle memory must be unlearned before wheel muscle memory learned. In addition, a shifter might be the best option, as a handbrake is more or less essential in Dirt Rally and without a shifter one must contort oneself to use a wheel face button or the clutch. Using the clutch turned into a bit of a disaster, as my brain was telling me that turning the wheel with the clutch depressed was all wrong. Brief, probably silly, notions that if I played like this enough, would it hamper real driving leading to real crash-death-horrowshow? Maybe not, but I just couldn't get on with it. Settling for the triangle button on the right group of four, the 'Y' button on 360 pad if you like, seemed the best compromise for now. There are possibilities for using a cheapo joystick as handbrake, maybe a mod for the future.

However! Holy frijoles! The game is alive! A few seating alterations are needed, bringing my monitor closer to bathe in LCD sunshine, a different chair etc. but not as much of a faff as I'd imagined and so, so worth it. The wheel kicks and spits at you as the car crashes into barriers and ditches (ahem), shimmies a little as the tyres scrabble for grip, goes light as the throttle is stamped, goes heavy as the brakes are applied and generally provides all the sort of useful feedback that motoring journalists bang on about when they can 'feel the road'. I'm sure it's not that good, and perhaps the Fanatec system would be, but for the cost? For me, it is a good balance.

Naturally, thoughts are now turning to circuit racing games. Which to try? Assetto Corsa? Raceroom? ProjectCars? Equally as naturally, unwanted, expensive upgrade dreams are arriving with depressing pit-lane regularity - perhaps a proper wheel stand? A seat? A projector? Oculus Rift? Perhaps the HTC Vive. 6 degrees of motion home-built racing set up?



That's for the future. Play it safe. For now.